I’m deeply grateful for Anna Quindlen’s wisdom and I hope to always remember who the experts truly are.
I hope you enjoy it as much as me!
On Being the Mommy
by Anna Quindlen
If not for the photographs, I might have a hard time believing they ever existed. The pensive infant with the swipe of dark bangs and the black button eyes of a Raggedy Andy doll. The placid baby with the yellow ringlets and the high piping voice. The sturdy toddler with the lower lip that curled into an apostrophe above her chin. ALL MY BABIES are gone now.
I say this not in sorrow but in disbelief. I take great satisfaction in what I have today: three almost-adults, two taller than I am, one closing in fast. Three people who read the same books I do and have learned not to be afraid of disagreeing with me in their opinion of them, who sometimes tell vulgar jokes that make me laugh until I choke and cry, who need razor blades and shower gel and privacy, who want to keep their doors closed more than I like. Who, miraculously, go to the bathroom, zip up their jackets and move food from plate to mouth all by themselves.
Like the trick soap I bought for the bathroom with a rubber duckie at its center, the baby is buried deep within each, barely discernible except through the unreliable haze of the past.
Everything in all the books I once pored over is finished for me now. Penelope Leach. T. Berry Brazelton. Dr. Spock. The ones on sibling rivalry and sleeping through the night and early-childhood education, all grown obsolete. Along with Goodnight Moon and Where the Wild Things Are, they are battered, spotted, well used. But I suspect that if you flipped the pages dust would rise like memories. What those books taught me, finally, and what the women on the playground taught me, and the well-meaning relations — what they taught me was that they couldn’t really teach me very much at all.
Raising children is presented at first as a true-false test, then becomes multiple choice, until finally, far along, you realize that it is an endless essay. No one knows anything. One child responds well to positive reinforcement, another can be managed only with a stern voice and a timeout.
One boy is toilet trained at 3, his brother at 2. When my first child was born, parents were told to put baby to bed on his belly so that he would not choke on his own spit-up. By the time my last arrived, babies were put down on their backs because of research on sudden infant death syndrome. To a new parent this ever-shifting certainty is terrifying, and then soothing. Eventually you must learn to trust yourself. Eventually the research will follow.
First science said environment was the great shaper of human nature. But it certainly seemed as though those babies had distinct personalities, some contemplative, some gregarious, some crabby. And eventually science said that was right, and that they were hard-wired exactly as we had suspected. Still, the temptation to defer to the experts was huge.
The literate parent, who approaches everything; cooking, decorating, life as though there were a paper due or an exam scheduled, is in particular peril when the kids arrive.
How silly it all seems now, the obsessing about language acquisition and physical milestones, the riding the waves of normal, gifted, hyperactive, all those labels that reduced individuality to a series of cubbyholes. But I could not help myself. I had watched my mother casually raise five children born over 10 years, but by watching her I intuitively knew that I was engaged in the greatest and potentially most catastrophic task of my life. I knew that there were mothers who had worried with good reason, that there were children who would have great challenges to meet.
We were lucky; ours were not among them. Nothing horrible or astonishing happened: there was hernia surgery, some stitches, a broken arm and a fuchsia cast to go with it. Mostly ours were the ordinary everyday terrors and miracles of raising a child, and our children’s challenges the old familiar ones of learning to live as themselves in the world. The trick was to get past my fears, my ego and my inadequacies to help them do that.
I remember 15 years ago poring over one of Dr. Brazelton’s books on child development, in which he describes three different sorts of infants: average, quiet, and active. I was looking for a sub-quiet codicil for an 18-month-old who did not walk. Was there something wrong with his fat little legs? Was there something wrong with his tiny little mind? Was he developmentally delayed, physically challenged? Was I insane? Last year he went to China. Next year he goes to college. He can talk just fine. He can walk, too.
Every part of raising children is humbling, too. Believe me, mistakes were made. They have all been enshrined in the Remember-When-Mom-Did Hall of Fame. The outbursts, the temper tantrums, the bad language, mine, not theirs. The times the baby fell off the bed. The times I arrived late for preschool pickup. The nightmare sleepover. The horrible summer camp. The day when the youngest came barreling out of the classroom with a 98 on her geography test, and I responded, What did you get wrong? (She insisted I include that.) The time I ordered food at the McDonald’s drive-through speaker and then drove away without picking it up from the window. (They all insisted I include that.) I did not allow them to watch the Simpsons for the first two seasons. What was I thinking?
But the biggest mistake I made is the one that most of us make while doing this. I did not live in the moment enough. This is particularly clear now that the moment is gone, captured only in photographs. There is one picture of the three of them sitting in the grass on a quilt in the shadow of the swing set on a summer day, ages 6, 4 and 1. And I wish I could remember what we ate, and what we talked about, and how they sounded, and how they looked when they slept that night. I wish I had not been in such a hurry to get on to the next thing: dinner, bath, book, bed. I wish I had treasured the doing a little more and the getting it done a little less.
Even today I’m not sure what worked and what didn’t, what was me and what was simply life. When they were very small, I suppose I thought someday they would become who they were because of what I’d done. Now I suspect they simply grew into their true selves because they demanded in a thousand ways that I back off and let them be. The books said to be relaxed and I was often tense, matter-of-fact and I was sometimes over the top.
And look how it all turned out. I wound up with the three people I like best in the world, who have done more than anyone to excavate my essential humanity. That’s what the books never told me. I was bound and determined to learn from the experts. It just took me a while to figure out who the experts were.
If you enjoyed that post you might also like reading these two.
The Boredom of Motherhood
Whoever thought that mothering would be boring? I sure didn’t when I signed on. I assumed I’d be busy. And I am, overwhelmingly so sometimes. But what I never imagined was that I could be busy and bored at the same time. Keep Reading
Loving Kindness Meditation for Pregnancy and for Moms
I clearly remember the moment I first encountered loving kindness meditation. Laying on the floor of a unfamiliar yoga studio in a new city back in 2000 – the instructor directed us to relax our bodies and then invited us to follow her in a meditation in which we directed kindness to another. As she led us through it, I felt my heart open and so many warm, soft and peaceful feelings of love followed through me. I was hooked.
Years later when I became pregnant with my daughter I adapted the wording and began practicing this form of meditation to connect with her. It worked beautifully. And so I began teaching it in my prenatal yoga classes and in my HypnoBirthing childbirth preparation courses. Keep Reading
There were a few different ideas of when our “due date” was. According to the pie chart at the doctor’s office – the one that calculates a due date based on your last monthly cycle, our baby was to be born on June 21st – the summer solstice. Our first ultrasound at 13 weeks indicated otherwise, and gave us a due date of June 19th. My mom, however, told me our baby would be born exactly 266 days from conception, just as all her babies had been born – so that was the date in our heads – June 24th, 2013. And just as my mom predicted, I went into labour on the morning of the 24th.
It was a Monday, and the weather was beautiful. We got up in the morning a bit earlier than normal to get ready and make the drive out to Fort Qu’Appelle where our midwife, Debbie was. When we got in the car around 0900, I felt a mild tightening, something that felt much like period cramps. After about 20 minutes of these cramps coming and going, I decided to secretly time them – I felt like I could have been imagining them and didn’t want to get too excited. Sure enough, they kept on happening – regularly for 30 seconds a time every 3 minutes. When I told Brennan, he turned down the music – we were listening to the new National album and he was pretty into it, “are you serious?” he asked, and we both grinned. When we got to the Women’s Health Centre, and then into the room to see Debbie, I still couldn’t believe this could be it. She asked how things were going, and I casually responded “I think I might be in labour?”. She got me on the bed, did a quick check with her own grin and said “I never like to say anything, but I can say that I don’t need to do anything to help you along”. We did a non stress test which indicated that my contractions were, in fact, coming in fairly regular intervals and consistent in their strength. “How do you feel” she asked, and I told her that they felt great – surges through my body that were telling me that my baby was coming, and they actually felt really good!! With a quick “I’ll probably be seeing you later” we were on our way back to Regina.
I had made plans with a friend and her 11 month old daughter to go to Wascana pool for the afternoon. I couldn’t see why this wouldn’t still be a good idea, I loved being in water so much and it really was a beautiful day. Of course, I told her that my labour had started and we spent the afternoon giggling like school girls and floating around the pool. It was fun to have this “secret labour” – there were a number of people who, staring at my round pregnant belly asked when I was due and I could hardly stop myself from saying “Right Now!”
Brennan and I met back up at home around 1730. By this time, the surges were a little more intense, but they were still about 3 minutes apart. I asked Brennan to make one of my favourite meals – a quinoa vegetable dish with peanut sauce and pickles on top. While he was busy in the kitchen, I lit the candles I had received at my blessingway from all the supportive women in my life, played the affirmations that Brennan and I had written and recorded in his studio and found myself on all fours rocking back and forth. I was so happy that our baby was coming to us. I felt safe, confident and secure. I was blown away with the powerful feelings rushing through my body and feeling strong and ready. When Brennan came upstairs with supper around 1830, I joined him in the bathroom where I had moved my music, a number of candles, and my yoga mat. I had a few bites of supper, and felt a powerful surge that caused me to throw up. With each surge after that, I continued to throw up. It was strange, and definitely unexpected. I didn’t feel ill at all, and hadn’t been sick my entire pregnancy! As the surges continued and became more intense, I moved into our clawfoot tub. I found myself going deeply inside my own head, closing my eyes, and giving in to what I can only describe as my natural birthing instincts. The surges continued to fill me with a deep knowing that our baby was coming and that my body knew what to do. I also had a lot of help from Brennan, who could anticipate when a surge was going to start, support me from a laying position and catch my vomit which continued to shoot out of me with every surge! Throughout this entire time, Brennan had been in contact with our Doula who came over to check on us and noted how well we were coping thus far, and with our Midwife, who encouraged us over the phone. At 2100, during one of the surges, we heard a loud “POP”, and my water broke in the tub! And what a relief! Brennan called the midwife and she told us to meet her at the hospital around 2230. He shot off a message with the plan to the doula, and I continued to labour in the tub while he packed up the car. When he came back up, he helped my out of the tub, and I had a few more surges sitting on the toilet. At this point, we saw the bloody show and knew things were continuing to progress. My surges were at least a minute and a half, and still about three minutes apart, Brennan helped find my clothes and we ventured out to the car. Once outside, I had another strong contraction that brought me to my knees, invited a loud moan and a whole lot of pressure. I rode to the hospital on my hands and knees, moaning through each contraction. Our doula followed us and stayed with me while Brennan registered me and brought out a wheelchair. There wasn’t any way I was going to sit though! I rode on all fours all the way up to Labour and Delivery! I guess they figured I was definitely in labour and I skipped triage and was put into a room immediately.
Our midwife, with impeccable timing arrived just as we got into the room, checked me and said “You’re at 9cm – perhaps you’ll have your baby today just as you expected!” We figured this meant no time to set up the birthing pool and I got into a squatting position on the bed where I began to push. Very quickly, and with only the tip of my finger, I could feel my baby’s head!! “It has hair!” I said! My surges continued as they had, powerful and regular for a long time, We tried moving into different positions, squatting, hands and knees, side lying, back lying, on the toilet, lunging – you name it, I would try it. But baby had other plans and really just wanted to stay inside.
At 0300, we decided to do a consult with the OBGYN on call. Have I mentioned that up until this point I hadn’t opened my eyes?? I was so deeply in my own birthing world I hadn’t bothered to take a look around the room and was happy to see everyones smiling and encouraging faces! When the doctor came in, she was, unfortunately quite rude. She questioned why I hadn’t been given any pain medications (because I didn’t feel I needed them), she asked why I didn’t have an IV drip (because I had been drinking tons of water), and seemed upset and annoyed at my decision to keep on labouring instead of accepting her offer of interventions (baby was not stressed, I felt like I could go on). With no medical reason to intervene, I opted to continue labouring and reconsult when she was out of surgery in a couple of hours. In those next two hours I really thought “this is it” I tuned into my body even more and negotiated with it to bring our baby to us. We tried more positions and I pushed and pushed and pushed. Baby was so close, the head would emerge slightly with each surge but it wasn’t enough to complete the birth.
When the doctor returned, there had still been no progression and so I agreed to try the suction. She apologized for her rudeness earlier, explaining that she was not usually so blunt and brief but she had a c-section to attend to. We accepted her apology and made our birthing wishes clear to her – that we didn’t want any unnecessary interventions, that we wanted delayed cord clamping, to discover the sex of our baby and that mine and baby’s care would continue to be under the midwife after our baby was born. To say that she seemed annoyed all over again would be a bit of an understatement, but she agreed. With the suction attached to our baby’s head, it took three more contractions before fully coming into our world. Our midwife took our baby from the doctors hands and put him on my chest. Our doula was able to remind them that we wanted to discover the sex of our baby, “He’s a boy!!” I discovered!! For the next hour we cuddled with our son skin to skin while they worked on fixing me up. Emmett latched on and breast fed while Brennan and I drifted off to sleep. After everything had settled we weighed and measured him. He was 8lbs, 13oz, and 20.5inches long. A healthy and very calm baby who continues to nurse well, sleep well, and of course, steal the hearts of everyone he has met!
I loved birthing our baby. I felt so supported by the people I had chosen to be around me as I brought him into this world and so deeply in tune with my own body. I am proud of myself and the people around me who continued to challenge the push for medical intervention, but also for being open to the turn that it took when my labour stalled and we needed to go down a different path. I am forever grateful for my husband, Brennan, our midwife, Debbie, our two doulas, Angie and Karen, our hypnobirthing instructor, Marie, and to all those who encouraged us to believe in the power and art of birth and advocate for the importance of choice in the whole process. I am so excited to do it again someday, with even greater confidence than before!
written by Jaclyn R.
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Here are several abstracts on the antibacterial properties of vernix. There’s a good reason why babies should not be bathed right away after birth. The power of vernix is truly astounding. Its main benefits are its various antimicrobial properties, which help protect a newborn against a wide variety of infections. Keep Reading.
At 4 days postdate I was starting to get a bit antsy waiting for baby to arrive. Wednesday was an emotional day for me. So that evening I decided to take my own advice and watch a love story to get the oxytocen flowing. It seemed to work (that in combination with the acupuncture of Tuesday) and I woke up at 2:30 am with surges. I didn’t want to get my hopes up, so I just relaxed into them and waited to see what would happen. Sure enough they were coming consistently. Keep Reading
It’s no secret that women are different from men. Women give birth, have menstrual pain, breastfeed, have hot flashes, and are sometimes known to have the occasional mood swing. Clary Sage essential oil then should also be no secret to women!
This is one of my all time favorite oils. Here is why…
Clary Sage essential oil is known for its uplifting and mood-lightening attributes and also for its anti-fungal, antispasmodic, sedative, and soothing properties. Clary Sage has traditionally been used by women to soothe monthly discomfort associated with their menstrual cycles and to help with emotional stress, damaged hair, hot flashes, lactation, mood swings, and more.
There is even research on the subject. Clary Sage was shown to help with relieving menstrual pain, alleviating pain during labor, and helping relieve anxiety.
- Study: An aromatherapy massage (consisting of clary sage and other essential oils) may be an effective treatment for menstrual pain in high school girls. Read the full study here.
- Study: An observational study done by midwives over the last 8 years have suggested that aromatherapy using clary sage and chamomile essential oil are effective in alleviating pain and that aromatherapy can be effective in reducing maternal anxiety, fear and/or pain during labor. Read more about the study here.
- Study: One study found that animals who were given clary sage essential oil-enriched food from the date of conception, showed a significant reduction of dominant and anxiety-like behavior compared to animals who were given sunflower oil-enriched food. Clary Sage essential oil, in this study, was found to posses anxiety relieving properties. Read more about the study here.
It’s no wonder why Clary Sage should be every woman’s best friend!
Tips from dōTERRA:
For menstrual discomfort, massage 3-5 drops of Clary Sage onto your abdomen.
Diffuse to help uplift your mood.
Add Clary Sage to your Epsom salt bath to help relieve nerves and anxiety. Combine Clary Sage and Roman Chamomile essential oils for an even more relaxing bath.
Use Clary Sage to make a deep Deep Hair Conditioner to help stimulate the scalp and promote hair growth.
Put 1-2 drops on your pillow to help you have a better night’s rest.
Tips from dōTERRA Facebook Fans:
“I used [Clary Sage] for labor pains and to start milk production. I had it in just 1 day after my daughters birth! Loved it!” -Josh-Sylvia McBride
“I put it in my shampoo and on my feet at night. Clary Sage is by far my favorite oil. My body finally feels regulated and I’ve been losing less hair in my shower”-Jaclyn Smith
“I put it on my abdomen for menstrual cramps and they are gone within minutes! I would chose Clary Sage over Ibuprofen any day!” -Amanda Deeter Freestone
“I apply to ankles and feet and heart center for night hot flashes. Also apply to pulse points (wrists, neck) for the calming benefits during the day. Will have to try the liver area. Love Clary Sage!” -Renee Frensko
“It helps relieve my headaches” -Starla Allen
“I use it mixed with coconut oil for hair massage to keep my hair thick and healthy.” -Arpita Chadha
“I use it to help me sleep at night. Put a drop on back of neck and 1 drop on front of neck – 15 minutes later – sleeping.” -Jeri Harwell
I hope you find this essential oil as helpful as I do!
If you enjoyed learning about this essential oil, you might also like these two articles.
Here are some of the ways I think they would be awesome to use.
1. Dry hands – knuckles that crack and bleed because of dryness.
2. Sore noses – ’tis the season for colds, and repeated run-ins with the tissue box can leave your nose red and sore. Keep Reading
Here are some of the ways I think they would be awesome to use.
1. Dry hands – knuckles that crack and bleed because of dryness.
2. Sore noses – ’tis the season for colds, and repeated run-ins with the tissue box can leave your nose red and sore.
3. Chafed skin – the lotion bar won’t prevent the skin from chafing but it does an awesome awesome job at helping it heal.
4. Eczema – especially good when you add the essential oils that are great for healing eczema to the recipe (see notes below).
5. Diaper rash – all the ingredients in this recipe are great for the skin and safe for little ones. It can be used with every diaper change as a way to keep your baby’s sensitive skin healthy.
6. Growing Bellies – this use is especially for the pregnant ladies. During pregnancy the skin stretches so much that it can often feel tight and itchy. These lotion bars are the prefect remedy for that.
7. Mystery Rash – sometimes this just happens. You get a rash in one area of your body for some strange unknown reason. The lotion bar is a great way to help the skin heal. As a small aside, a rash can sometimes be stress related, a sort of last-straw situation because of an overloaded immune system. In other words, when the immune system can’t take any more, a rash shows up signaling “I’m done!”.
8. Dry Gardening hands – I LOVE gardening, but I don’t enjoy how much the dirt drys out my skin even when I’m wearing gloves. I’ve taken to applying lotion before putting on my gloves, but it often wasn’t enough. Now I can’t wait for spring and to use these lotion bars instead!I’m sure that as you read this blog you might come up with additional uses for the lotion bar. Actually once you start using it, you might wonder how you ever lived without one. Made of coconut oil, cocoa butter, vitamin E, a bit of beeswax and essential oils, these natural moisturizing lotion bars will nourish and soothe your dry skin and you get to feel good about all the ingredients. To use the bar, just run it over your skin and let your body’s natural heat melt the lotion for some extreme skin hydration.
1/3 to 1/4 cup beeswax
½ cup coconut oil
½ cup cocoa butter
1 teaspoon vitamin E oil
15 – 30 drops of dōTERRA essential oil
clean old mason jar
silicone mold (you can find these at kitchen stores and craft stores)
Please post and let me know how you are using your lotion bar.
If you enjoyed reading this post, you might also like these two articles…
BEFORE “nature calls”, shake the bottle and then spritz the #2 Spray into the toilet bowl. Approximately 3 or 4 spritzes should do it. Then do your “business”. The oils will disperse over the water creating a vapor barrier and trapping any offensive odors! Keep reading to learn how to make your own.
I went to sleep Thursday night feeling really restless. I had a bit of cramping and uncomfortableness but ended up finally falling asleep around 3am. My husband got up to leave for work around 6 am, shortly after he left I decided I get up to use the washroom. As I was crawling back to bed I felt a little trickle of fluid down my leg, thinking maybe I just didn’t sit long enough on the toilet I went back to the bathroom to only have the trickling continue and get heavier and heavier. I realized that my water had broken. It wasn’t a gush but enough to let me know that something was taking place.
I called my husband to let him know that “something” was happening but told him not to rush as I hadn’t experienced a surge yet. Well no sooner than five minutes after I got off the phone with him the surges started. He ended up coming home from the field and by the time he got home my surges were already 8 minutes apart. I decided to have a shower and try to relax but ended up getting a bit excited. This was my first baby and not knowing what to expect I got a tad excited when my surges quickly went from 8 min apart down to about 5 min apart. And we live about 45 minutes from the hospital. We decided we best get going.
The whole drive I practiced my breathing and visualization techniques. I was feeling very calm and in control, plus very excited. We arrived to the hospital around 8:30am. My doctor was in clinic and wasn’t able to see me until noon but by 10am my surges were coming every two minutes lasting 50-60 seconds long. They were pretty intense so I asked for another doctor to come and check me. Again being a first time mom I was convinced that since my surges were so close together that this baby must be right around the corner. Boy was I wrong. The doctor checked me and confirmed that I was only 1.5-2cm.
So I decided I would do whatever I could to speed this process along. I used my birth ball and found that sitting on it and leaning over the bed helped a lot while my husband did some light touch massage and some pressure point on my sacrum. We continued to do this all day plus I listened to the spa channel on my iPhone which really helped me zone out and relax. The doctor came in at noon (2cm) at 4pm (3cm) at 8pm (3.5cm) and then once more at midnight where I had only progressed to 4 cm. I was feeling very tired and played out.
I found the best way to cope with the surges was to have all the lights out and to just focus on my breathing. I found it difficult to relax if people were talking around me so I had asked my family who was there with my husband and I to just keep things light and quiet. They took turns sitting in the room in the dark with me so that my husband could get a couple hours of shut eye.
I had my mother, mother in law and sister all along with us. It was super helpful having them there as a support system.
By 2 am I felt like I didn’t have a lot left in me and started to feel a bit defeated. I had walked, breathed, listened to music, light touch massage, pressure points on my wrist and ankles… Everything I could think of. I had intended to have this baby naturally but I found myself pondering some medication options as I just felt completely drained.
I had a fantastic nurse who explained to me some less invasive pain management options. At about 2:15 I decided to try some laughing gas or whatever you call it. Well that only lasted about ten minutes. I found having the mask on my face made it really hard to breathe properly and I found that it didn’t make a difference. I then opted for a small does of morphine given to me in the hip. That was enough to help me sleep through about 5 surges at a time. And then I would wake for a few and then have another mini nap.
I kept my eyes closed for almost the whole labour and tried to avoid looking at the clock. But when I opened my eyes to see the sun coming up I got very excited. I had either dilated over night or I was afraid my doctor was going to suggest we visit other options although she was very supportive of my wanting a natural delivery.
My doctor soon came to check on me and I almost squealed with excitement when she told me I was 9.5-10 cm! I could barely believe it. She told me at 7am I’d start pushing and that I should start my hypnobirthing techniques and focus on moving that baby down over the next hour.
I honestly can say that the “pushing” phase was my favourite part. I didn’t feel any pain except for maybe some stretching-like discomfort right when her head was almost out. It was such a beautiful experience.
Harper Anne was born at 7:37am weighing in at 5lbs 14 oz and 19.5 inches long. She’s perfect and we love her to bits!!
I don’t regret having the shot of morphine as I felt its what I needed to do at the time to get through it all. Hypnobirthing certainly helped alot and I would recommend the class to everyone I meet!! Thanks again Marie!!
Written by Ebony K.
If you enjoyed reading this story, you might also enjoy the story of my son Markus’ birth
At 4 days postdate I was starting to get a bit antsy waiting for baby to arrive. Wednesday was an emotional day for me. So that evening I decided to take my own advice and watch a love story to get the oxytocen flowing. It seemed to work (that in combination with the acupuncture of Tuesday) and I woke up at 2:30 am with surges. I didn’t want to get my hopes up, so I just relaxed into them and waited to see what would happen. Sure enough they were coming consistently. So at 3:15 am we phoned the doulas and they got on the road to Regina. Keep Reading
Quinoa is very high in protein, and it’s a complete protein. Using it in a salad is a great way to increase your protein intake during pregnancy. Not sure how much protein you need? Learn more here.
For those of you new to quinoa, it is a whole grain which is naturally high in protein. You cook quinoa as you would rice, 1 cup quinoa to two cups water for about 15 minutes or until all the water is absorbed, let stand covered off heat for 5 minutes to fluff. Keep Reading
I love this great idea and super duper marketing campaign. The ad is worth the watch just for the laughs!
If you are up for creating your own version.. here is a great recipe.
Here what you’ll need:
- 10 drops Lemongrass Essential Oil
- 10 drops Grapefruit Essential Oil
- 10 drops Bergamot Essential Oil
- 8 ounces of water
- (1) small spray bottle
Fill the spray bottle with 8 ounces of water, add 10 drops each of the Lemongrass, Grapefruit and Bergamot Essential Oils, and shake.
Here’s how to use:
BEFORE “nature calls”, shake the bottle again and then spritz the #2 Spray into the toilet bowl. Approximately 3 or 4 spritzes should do it. Then do your “business”. The oils will disperse over the water creating a vapor barrier and trapping any offensive odors!
I hope that helps you make the call of nature more pleasant for everyone one.
ps – I use DoTERRA essential oils because I truly believe they are the best quality oils on the market. You can learn more by reading the post listed below.
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Using essential oils during your labour can be a wonderful way to support what your body is doing in a gentle and holistic way. If you are new to the idea of essential oils, please read my earlier post about why using essential oils is safe and beneficial.
During birth there is truly a lot going on, at every level : physically, emotionally, mentally and even spiritually. The thing I love about essential oils is that they help at all these levels and really give the body, the mind and the spirit tools to help regain balance. Keep Reading
I woke at 5:00 am on July 8th with regular surges, nine days past my guess date. I was very excited that things were finally starting, but I still tried to sleep or relax until a little later in the morning. Finally I woke my husband, Kris and we went for a walk to keep things going since the surges were still quite mild. We went and visited some friends and tried to keep moving, but close to lunch time the surges started to fade away so we met another friend for Indian food, then kept on walking. I made a special smoothie with castor oil in it in the afternoon and things really got started then. I laboured at home until 5:00 am on the 9th.
It was great to be home where I was comfortable and could move. Kris was an amazing support, and I also had two doulas, plus my mom and a very close friend. It was a bit of a party. Unfortunately there were no midwives available during my pregnancy and birth. I spent a lot of time in a warm birth pool (which was the very best pain relief!) or rolling around on a yoga ball. I listened to the “musical acupuncture” CD and used lots of different positions and deep, low vocalizations. I remembered a lot of the good advice from Hypnobirthing, yoga, and aquasize classes, and I felt relaxed and happy, even through some pretty intense moments.
I pushed at home for about 3 hours, but the baby didn’t seem to be moving much, so we decided to go to the hospital. I walked across the street and was put in a wheelchair and wheeled right into Labour and Delivery where baby Henry was born 2 hours later. His dad guided him out and put him on my tummy. I didn’t need any drugs or interventions, just a change of scenery and some new positions to push in – those beds that convert all the different ways are pretty neat, and the hospital staff were very respectful of the birth plan that we gave them.
It ended up being very good that we went to the hospital in the end anyway, since I lost a lot of blood right after and the placenta had to be manually extracted by a doctor with small hands and long fingers – OUCH, but I
was glad to not need an epidural or tools for the process. We had some lovely cuddle time right from the start and Henry nursed well – when he could keep his eyes open. One day later we went home and I have felt pretty good since!
Henry Atticus Dueck weighed 8 pounds 15 ounces and was 23 inches longs (56 centimetres). When the maternity visiting program nurse met him a few days later she asked if he was a hypnobirthing baby, since he was so calm, which I thought was nice. We have had wonderful support from our family, friends, and community.
Written by Dennie, August 2013
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Marie’s Note : I am deeply grateful to Jill for sharing this HypnoBirthing story. It’s often difficult to find positive birth stories if you are in a situation where there is a medical reason for an induction. I hope everyone who faces such a situation is able to read stories like this one. And trust that no matter how your birth unfolds the HypnoBirthing skills of calming yourself and staying connected to your partner and your baby will serve you well.
At 34 weeks and 3 days, I was diagnosed with a condition called Cholestasis. Cholestasis is a condition in which the normal flow of bile in the gallbladder is affected by the high amounts of pregnancy hormones. Keep Reading
First thing to remember is that they are many factors will play into the situation. So I think that it’s important to realize that no one technique will be the ticket! The best advice is to do all of the suggestions for preventing or limiting tearing. The more angles that you come at this from the more likely you will birth your baby with an intact perineum.
Ok. Starting the list of techniques… Keep Reading